Holding Out for a Hero

The playoffs are a tough time, when I want all my favorite players to have transcendent, legendary, career-making experiences… while their teams still lose. But someone has to win every round, and so it may as well have happened like this: John Tavares, middle school science teacher, registered tax lawyer and upholder of dad-styles, scores to tie […]

Playoff Predictions: Wild Wild West

Now onto the Western Conference Playoff Predictions, where we be like… Disclaimers: Chuck: I have watched some Western Conferences games this year, but those 10pm start times are killers. My predictions are based off:  the games I HAVE watch; NHL Network, what I’ve read about the teams, and Ms. Cleo. Pants: I need to be honest […]

Playoff Predictions: Beasts of the East

It’s here! The NHL Playoffs!  Our lives are on hold until further notice. Welcome to our annual playoff predictions, where Chuck selects teams based on actual hockey things and Pants make wishes on shiny pennies. (note from Pants: Amazingly, we have about the same track record. Maybe I learn things through texting with her.) Eastern Conference Canadiens […]

Foxy Friday: Derick Brassard

I watched the Kings/Rangers game Wednesday night.  I said I wouldn’t, but I’m visiting my parents and watched with my dad exactly the way we did in 1994 when last the NYR won the Cup.  Total time machine.  After twenty years  what has changed?  Absolutely nothing.  My anti-Rangers yelling at the TV is just more colorful and my father […]

Sunshine and Tan Lines

I never imagined I’d thank the Rangers for anything, but the day has come. Reminder: Chris Kreider went to BC.  See also: I hate myself. The Rangers took to the beach in Venice to shake off their Game 1 OT loss and work on their tans.  Pale guys with beards – that’s what playoff hockey is all […]

It’s Not Over

The Kings’ win over the Blackhawks last night ended hopes for a Stanley Cup Final I would actually care about.  While Sad Kaner Face is something I cannot handle today, I will admit that this is brilliant: We all know that I hate the Rangers, but I am surprised to admit that I don’t hate them […]

One Away

It’s days – or Conference Finals – like this when I wish the Blackhawks were my favorite team.  Wouldn’t that be fun? I like the Hawks a lot, and they bailed me out of some frustrated west coast years when I couldn’t watch Eastern Conference teams.  But it’s not the same, cheering for someone you […]

This Is The End

Allow me to pour my heart into a post in the very moment the Penguins have lost a Game 7. For starters, I hate the Rangers with a passion that you can’t understand unless you’re in your 24th year of hating a team with a fire of a thousand suns.  1990 was the year I […]

Be Cool

Penguins love me back, lead series vs. Rangers 3-1 It was another good night at Camp Pants, but let’s not get too excited yet.  I mean, in-game it’s fine to look like this picture I found by searching “Gibbons gif:” It’s exactly what Penguins’ fans looked like after the gif I really wanted: He meant to do […]

Night Moves

I had a good night.  Did you guys have a good night? Fleury throws another shutout, Pens lead Rangers 2-1 MAF had his second shutout in as many days, standing on his head at times to keep the NYR off the board in Game 3.  Not bad for a goalie who has playoff confidence problems, right? […]

Happy Monday

Happy Cinco de Mayo, everyone!  I got to wear shorts and a tank top this weekend AND the Penguins won last night, so I don’t even hate Mondays.  It’s Day 20 of the playoffs, and if you spent the past few days enjoying the sun, here’s what was happening on TV: Penguins and Rangers series […]

Bring It On (Again)

Round 2 is upon us like prom season, and everyone finally has their dates.  How are you feeling?  Like the prettiest girl in the room?  Anyone afraid someone else might wear the same dress?  I’m nervous and we definitely need a chaperone. We bid Round 1 farewell with this announcement: I am no longer 100% right. Thanks […]

Hard Out Here

Well, that was a night. Penguins take years off my life, defeat Blue Jackets in series: 4-2 What are we supposed to do?  NOT hope for leads because they get snatched away? NEVER want a power play for fear of giving up a shorty?  I don’t know which end is up except the Penguins won […]

Weekend Update

I didn’t get to watch much hockey after Friday night, but the playoffs wait for no DVR.  In case anyone else (mostly) missed the weekend festivities… The networks have all kinds of on-hiatus hockey players pitching in as commentators during these playoffs.  Let us make the offer official: Alex Pietrangelo, you and your currently unemployed […]

Of Course It Did

Well… Last night I was very PANIC! AT THE DISCO.  I feel a little better this morning , so allow me to re-edit my thoughts. Blue Jackets: 4; Penguins: 3 [Series tied 2-2] Listen, Fleury has been the Penguins’ best player all series.  Sometimes he is their only player actually playing.  So much has been […]

The Night Before

Allow me to present the Day 6 update as an autobiographical look at my catastrophic emotional instability. Penguins: 4, Blue Jackets 3 [Pens lead series 2-1] This game started and an instant later the Jackets had scored two goals.  Okay, maybe it took 3:18, but it felt like a heartbeat.  The Penguins were not ready, not willing and not […]

Days Go By

I hope everyone enjoyed the weekend.  I embarked on a “No carb left behind” mission and managed to consume every jellybean within a 10-mile radius (that moved as I did).  Mostly I was drowning Penguins-related sorrows and the sound of “Letang” from my memory. Anyway, let’s have a look at Friday (Day Three): Canadiens: 4; […]

Day Two (and Three, if you count OT)

One more  night in the books!  Welcome back to my way to be sure that I have noticed every playoff game around the League for three minutes.  Some of you probably called in “overtime” to work and are just waking up. Blues:4, Blackhawks: 3 Look,  overtime is one thing.  Triple overtime is two more things […]

Day One

There are two ways to spend any night during the NHL Playoffs: Enjoy a composed evening of important hockey that matters on a theoretical level, but not to your team. Like me, last night: One goal games all around, and no one made it look easy.  Here we go, Round One: Day One already gearing […]

The Edge of Glory

Since Psych was not renewed for a 9th season, Chuck & I are officially the best faux-psychic show in town.  No time is more ripe for our charlatan act than Day 1 of the 2014 NHL playoffs.  So sit back and allow us to disagree slightly on who will win in the first round. EAST Bruins […]