I’m not much of one for cars, especially since a certain defenseman’s Lamborghini just makes me laugh. But scars? For bikini season, we thought we’d bring back this gem MDZ is sporting: “When Evgeni Malkin cut me with a skate I felt lucky to have ribs. I got 50 stitches, no staples. I’ve had to […]
The Kings won again, they always do. I’ll let Chuck or Dawn recap it for you. The game was exceptionally fun to watch, since I don’t really care about the outcome. But here’s something I do care about: HEY SID! He was on to Jumbrotron and, of course, promptly booed. Genius. He hasn’t played against […]
Now that it’s June, we might as well start talking about the elephant in the room: will the Caps re-sign Mike Green this summer? Or, more accurately, does anyone want to see my meltdown if they don’t? Before I put my head in an oven like Kate Winslet in The Holiday, please read this hilarious […]
We have to make a whole category for this if we’re going to get through the off-season. Can someone remind me what we did in the summer before Twitter? How did we ever know: Who makes double entendres with random-yet-endearing capitalization? What Ebs dreams of when he looks in the mirror? Who needs you to […]
Intern Jeff Skinner is pissed. Last year, zero Calder Trophy finalists were featured as Foxy Fridays. Not even Rookie of My Life Logan Couture, and not counting the time Jeff posted a picture of himself holding a baby. Zero legitimate Foxy Fridays. This year, we’re giving them out like candy. First Landeshirtless over there in […]
Ever think you could watch a good-looking guy just do nothing all day? TA DA! Since we missed Memorial Day Mikey Monday yesterday, the lovely Katie Howell sent us this workout video. I have to do these planks endlessly for Tough Mudder training, so I should clearly be going to Mike’s gym. He doesn’t look […]
Monday I said, “Can we get an off-season photo of Steven Stamkos?” If he started wearing a ponytail for the summer, I want get my crying out of the way before workout videos start to pop up. Today, VOILA. This video of Steven accepting an award for being Steven-tastic not only includes him talking on a […]
Last night was bonkers. The Devils scored three goals while I was making mac & cheese, then the Rangers got them all back. The Rangers were bad, then great. Brodeur had one of those moments, like in the back of a cab when you know you’re going to throw up and you have to decide: […]
Tonight the Kings will try again to advance to the Stanley Cup Finals. They’ve lost just two games in three rounds. The @LAKings Twitter feed is spectacular, full of things only Judge Judy could get away with saying in a courtroom. I’d just like to remind the Washington Capitals that I’m available for snarky and potentially trouble-making […]
Listen. If this whole summer is going to be about hockey players in plaid shirts that aren’t buttoned all the way… we’re going to make it after all. I don’t even care that I hate this hat, because it makes me think of a kick-ass Butch Walker song: “Lights Out” Alternative exhibits in this case: […]
Chuck, for your grad school graduation, we all pitched in and got you a present. Haha, who are we kidding?! We’d never get you someone from Harvard! Congratulations!
We’re trying to keep Foxy Fridays to players still in the playoffs, since summer is long and cruel. The pickings are getting a little slim. But imagine if, say, the Wild had made it this far? Blank pages, people. Chuck is busy at her real job today (borrrrring!), so I’m honoring her turn by choosing […]
Break out the Mexicolas and sprinkles… It’s Intern Jeff Skinner’s birthday!! Jeff turns 20 today, so he’ll be doing… exactly what he does every other day. Drinking a gallon of milk, giving up his seat on the Metro and buying Girl Scout cookies. Sorry Skinns, we can Party in the USA next year. Oh heck, […]
The Rangers and Kings are up 1-0 in their respective series(es?). Tonight’s game isn’t till 9 PM. Otherwise, it’s a slow news day. Dale Hunter quit his job coaching the Caps (we are available!). You could watch the Capitals exit interviews – Nicky (how many chains are you wearing?), Mikey (why is your hat so […]
Lying dead on the floor in front of my TV was not an ideal Saturday night, but at least I wasn’t the only one. I won’t get down on the Caps for their game seven performance because it’s not what I want to remember all summer. This year, I watched more hockey than ever. I […]
I forgot it’s Friday! One night with zero hockey and I lose my mind, people. Good thing I had already selected this week’s Foxy Friday: Shane Doan. Things that are foxy: – Birthdays the day, but not the year, before mine (Libras FTW!) – Smiling even more than Intern Jeff Skinner – Wilderness activities – Eligible […]
Last night’s Caps/Rangers Game 6 was officially the most fun I’ve ever had at a hockey game. Maybe it was the Jeff Schultz Fan Club in front of us at warm-ups – hey, there really is someone for everyone. Maybe it was the “Let’s Let Karl’s Dogs Out” sign or the Flo Rida dance party. […]
The fates came out of their hole, looked for their shadows and decreed we shall see more of this: And no more of this: Okay, maybe one more: We extend sympathies to our Flyers fans. Yes really, even though I hate them. Losing sucks no matter if you’re my team or a great looking guy […]
Most girls will tell you there are few situations in life that cannot be explained by a scene from The Princess Bride. After the Caps’ loss to the Rangers last night, I feel Mostly Dead. Tortured. Gutted. But if you lean close enough, you might hear me whisper: In case you missed it (what on […]
The only reasons to be awake at 7 AM on a Saturday are you’re 1) still up from the night before or 2) buying playoff hockey tickets. I woke Gator up with a text and we debated (read: I peer pressured her). Something was telling me to go. The Force was communicating. So we went. […]