What?! Yeah … those crazy Canadians! It’s the second week of Battle of the Blades and this week’s theme was BRINGING SEXY BACK but trust me, Justin Timberlake was NO WHERE IN SIGHT! It came down to Tom Warner and Georges Laraque in the final skate off.

Tom skated to Bret Michael’s “Every Rose Has It’s Thorn” and I could hear Bret already cashing his royalty cheque (that’s Canadian for check to you US peeps) before the ink was dry and JR had finished taking a cold shower. Tom and his skating skank did something called shooting the dick, I mean, shooting the duck – I’m surprised JR didn’t make that slip! But JR did say that he would have split his pants and pulled both his hammies if he had tried that moved. Me thinks he would have pulled a few other things too!

Anywho ..moving on to one of my personal faves, Georges skated to Seal’s “A Kiss From a Rose” with his little adorable skating munchkin. He didn’t quite bring sexy back but he did skate well and do a double throw – far better technically than Tom but because he didn’t provide sexual favors, he got the boot.  BOO-HISS! But he was gracious in his exit and I will miss seeing him.

Now, I also have to add that ValKat tied for the lead technically giving a breath taking performance to 007’s “The Look of Love” and frickin’ melted the TV screen – NOW THAT WAS SEXY – YOW! And I was surprise the ice held up after he skated and didn’t melt from sheer hottness!

Not the mention the horribly sad interview with Valerie about how he and his family had little to eat when he was growing up in Russia and that is why he is skating for the charity that helps children in poverty all over the world. It was also HILARIOUS hearing him slam Florida saying that “No one cares about hockey there.” hahahahaha Love you, Val! Love you!

Stay tuned for next week’s installation for SKATING WITH VALERIE- RUSSIAN HOTTIE!

Tags: battle of the blades, georges laraque, jeremy roenick, tom warner, valerie bure