Ultimate Edition

Mother of all that is NSFW.

If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.  If you can’t say something that wouldn’t make Horward Stern blush, good luck writing a blog post that includes Sidney Crosby’s new SportChek workout campaign.

It should cost $5.99 a minute to hear what I’m thinking right now.

Don’t be ashamed if Nicki Minaj’s “Superbass” starts playing in your mind.

 

What is it about hitting things with a sledgehammer?!  When the apocalypse comes, Sid will be nice and warm in his log cabin with plenty of firewood, girls.

Pack your sleeping bags.

Is the Ultimate Crosby Experience getting to hold that resistance band?  Because I’m pretty sure I could tie it to my bumper and Sid would drag the Nealmobile right down the damned street, knocking over mailboxes and running red lights.

Yesterday was Sid’s birthday, and we got our wish. Let’s hope Intern Jeff Skinner doesn’t feel weird about entering us into this contest 87,000 times.

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Leave a Reply

  1. Alexandra Reply

    It sucks that you have to be a Canadian to enter 🙁
    Otherwise, I’d do anything in my power to spend time with my (future) hubby.
    Oh Canada, why must you hurt me so? </3

  2. MouthGuard Reply

    The dude holding the resistance band is seriously freaking the crap out of me. He’s like an uber-creepy reincarnation of Kojak. I don’t know how I feel about him shouting epithets at Sid’s derriere, estie de tabarnacle.

  3. REDEDICATING MY LIFE TO WINNING THIS CONTEST. FINALLY being a Canadian pays off.
    Also this commercial – I actually moaned out loud with my husband in the next room.
    Sweaty Sid in slow motion?? Then throwing that HUGE weight down like ‘whatever, NBD’??? My hormones never stood a chance.

  4. Not like I was being productive today, but finding this eliminated any hope of productivity.

    Does being fauxnadian count? And Jeff’s probably upset that the “Congrats on the new contract” office party was ruined. Sid commands our attention. Sorry, not sorry, Intern Jeff Skinner.

  5. Chuck Reply

    “This look like the pornography.” – Yiayia

  6. Farah Reply

    Lol I love Yiayia

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