The Chamber of Secrets is Open

- Posted in Like a Boss, Pants Loves, Well OBVIOUSLY.

Mike Green’s parents might want to check their family photo albums, because I think one is missing.  (I swear I was in DC the entire time.)  Someone busted into their vault at Gringott’s and we have learned:

1. Mike Green doesn’t wax his eyebrows. He was born with that perfection.

2. He went from having his baby face, to this one, then back to the exact same baby face.  How is that possible?

3. I would have loved him in middle school too, rocking the velvet collared shirt and the Nick Carter curtains.  Even then, he knew how to use product.

from worthless89.tumblr.com

This is serious “Do you like me? Circle yes or no.” material.  You’re doodling his name on your paper bag book covers and checking your Bonne Bell lip gloss in the locker mirror right now, aren’t you?

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  2. Totally squeeeing knowing this was when Mike was living in Calgary. EEK!
    This post is completely true….except for it’s Dr. Pepper Lip Smackers lip balm, not Bonne Bell.

  3. This hair. This hair is every boy I loved in junior high ever.

    Also – wikipediaed Mikey to double check his age and was totally Twilight Zoned out:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mike_Green_(ice_hockey_b._1979)

    (Do you like my verbing of two nouns in that sentence?) This Mike Green: Professional Hockey Player would have been in Victoria with me during junior high times. Victoria is not big. I probably know someone who knows him.

  4. Just got a text from my friend:

    “Who is doing this? Mikeyleaks? I feel like I owe them money for this.”

    • MIKEYLEAKS! If they had Paypal I would contribute.

  5. She continues:

    “I would put a love note in his locker but get the locker wrong and put it in his friend’s locker instead and then at lunch when the entire gang came back from second period they would find it and laugh at it. True story.”

  7. So with all the childhood photos of NHL players coming out I have not seen one of Kris Letang I don’t think he was ever a child. lol

  8. He was definitely that cool, older boy down the street that I had a crush on… Yep.
    Sad part is, I remember having a bazillion crushes on guys with that same haircut.