I’ve been collecting a folder of pics and gifs, for that day when the world just needs more Jonathan Toews. Today is that day.
Happy 25th birthday, Tazer!
We all know that Jonathan hates fun.
He prefers to win, and win often. Luckily the Blackhawks are pretty good at hockey and Toews himself is alright on the ice.
Going into the playoffs with nearly every possible point, the Hawks are poised to make a run at the recapturing the Cup they won in 2010. It’s safe to say that we know what Jon wants for his birthday:
Yes, exactly. He wants the other part of this beard.
When he’s not derping, walking behind locker room cameras in his shorts or making fun of Patrick Kane, Jonathan Toews is being nice to strangers…
… watching romantic comedies, avoiding cilantro and not vacuuming. Sounds like a date night to us.
He’s almost a full-time model by now, specializing in what you’d like your future husband to wear while meeting your parents at the venue for your wedding reception.
So happy birthday to the Captain, Cup-winner and a guy who makes everyone over 25 feel bad for not accomplishing more. He won’t have a party. He’ll stay home and do squats…
While waiting for your team to try him in the playoffs. Then he’ll hug you, when you’re ugly-crying after the Hawks run your team into the ground.
Flashbacks: Toews Turns 23, Toews Turns 24
Tags: Chicago Blackhawks, jonathan toews
“He won’t have a party. He’ll stay home and do squats…”
i am not a religious gal, but hallelujah, amen, and may [the hockey] god[s] bless him for it.
For the record, it’s also Dan Girardi’s birthday today. 4/29 is clearly a good day for hockey births.
My favorite part of that article is that his desert island pal choice is “not Kane.” Zing!
Captain Serious(ly Dreamy) is a special kind of guy, that’s for sure. I can’t wait to watch this team in the playoffs. I think we’re in for something special.
And happy birthday to Brandon Dubinsky and Dan Girardi as well!
NO RANGERS GET HAPPY BIRTHDAYS FROM ME RIGHT NOW!! I don’t care if your eyes are the color of the unspoiled sea in a place I cannot afford to visit!
Dubi can have one b/c I’m a bit sad #Lumbus didn’t make the post-season.
“New York Rangers” is Pants’ new trigger word.
Good to know. Btw Chuck, the Canadian consultant IS a Leafs fan. To which my response was “Oh dear,” followed by his “So you’re a Bruins fan, eh?”. Work might be tricky for a while…
Pants, you’re that afraid of a lowly 6th seed? 😉
Not afraid, per se. Well, I’m afraid of everything after what happened last season in Caps vs. Rangers. I’m more enraged or frenzied or possibly even unhinged at the existence of the Rangers all, let alone when playing one of my teams in the playoffs. I’ve felt this way about the Rangers since 1991. It doesn’t go away.
“specializing in what you’d like your future husband to wear while meeting your parents at the venue for your wedding reception.”
Always, always ALWAYS wear navy, Jon. Maybe tuck in your shirt but I’m NOT complaining because that sweater is SO spectacular. I want one for my husband. Can I have yours? Fantastic.
Can you and Sidney share the Cup this year? No? Erm…
My Toews collection has almost 90 photos and 20 gifs for occasions such as these, I will be looking at them all day long. Jonathan Toews is an incredible person, and I’m so glad that he is the captain of my beloved Blackhawks, and I honestly hope that they trample all the teams on the way to another summer of Stanley. 😀 Sorry I’m not sorry.
Jess is in Hawaii, which is why this comments section is missing declarations of her never ending love with Toews.
“Never ending love” might actually be an understatement…
YES I AM IN HAWAII SITTING IN A MACY’S TO HIDE FROM THE SUN AND USE THEIR FREE WIFI AND OLD LADIES ARE GIVING ME DIRTY LOOKS AND I AM EMBARASAING MY FRIEND CAROL BECAUSE I AM CRYING IN THE SHOE DEPARTMENT READING THIS POST.
ALL CAPS FOR THE CAPTAIN OF MY LIFE. NEVER ENDING. FOREVER. LOVE.
Unrelated it is also Leonardo DiCaprio’s birthday. He is THIRTY EIGHT and we are all super old now.
NOT unrelated. How is it every beautiful man’s birthday today??
Leo’s birthday, as I’m working on The Great Gatsby (plug plug), is actually November 11. So he’s been 38, and we’ve been old, for a while now.
ACTUALLY unrelated: I THINK I WANT TO SEE THE GREAT GATSBY MORE THAN I WANT TO MEET TAYLOR HALL.
Or maybe he can take me?
Sorry, that movie is like a trigger for me right now.