AreYouKiddingMePatrickKane?!

When it comes to the Blackhawks, it’s not easy to be the prettiest anything.

You’re well-dressed… till Patrick Sharp walks by.  Feeling reliably heroic… then you see Jonathan Toews.  Rugged?  Try Viktor Stalberg.  Good hair day? Ruined by Brent Seabrook.  You can’t even walk a dog without being upstaged by Duncan Keith and forget being adorable with Joey the Junior Reporter around.

But if you’re Patrick Kane, you can still have the prettiest pass in town.

 

No-look, cross-ice backhand to the wide-open top scorer for the OT winner? Stunned.  The Stars commentators are stunned.

Time for Jess’ favorite thing: a Patrick Kane Flying Hug.

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The Hawks are off to a 4-0 running start, led by Kane’s 7 points.  I know it’s only 4 games, but PK’s play demonstrates what teams were hoping (praying) to see from guys who went overseas during the lockout.  No rust.  Solid conditioning.  Sharp passing, good rhythm and raising the play of everyone else on the ice.

Check out this 3-on-nobody the other night.  Goalies wake up sweating in the middle of the night thinking about things like this:

 

Cue another Patrick Kane Flying Hug.

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At their home opener, the Hawks did one of those red carpet player entrances. These events apparently don’t require approval by the US Occupational Health and Safety Administration.  Tell me the velvet rope creates a safe distance here:

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Patrick Kane, feeling like a boss until…

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Patrick Sharp, Life Ruiner arrives.  Only to be outdone by:

stalberg Check out this sneaky beauty of a Stalberg goal.

Do you think Jamal Mayers…

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… and Dave Bolland were mad they wore the same suit, like Kelly & Brenda at the original 90210 prom?

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In the end, it doesn’t matter.  It never does.  Everyone’s strutting their stuff, feeling the love until this jerk swaggers in.

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He doesn’t even try.

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And he doesn’t stop.

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Until it’s back to the ice, where someone else might stand a chance.

kaner.gif by michaeldelzotto.tumblr.com

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Leave a Reply to Lindsay Cancel reply

  1. Jonny T is one rude ass individual, let me tell ya. Strutting all up in there with his jackets unbuttoned. I probably would have been that girl in the 2nd pic with her mouth gaping open in response to the splendor before me… or I would have been the one just outside the shot, escorted off the premise by security screaming, “Tazer, I want to make your babies!” Keep in mind this goes for the Stalberg pic as well. (I’m the woman under the R in “Sportswear”)

    Side Note: Pretty sure Bolland stole that suit from Claude Giroux.

  2. MY BABIES!!!!! I am SO HAPPY. The Blackhawks are coming to Vancouver next Friday and I am seriously considering going by myself because no one else is willing to pay the exorbitant ticket prices (cheapest nosebleeds are well over $100 after taxes and fees). It will be the most grown up thing I will have ever done. And I do not miss the irony in that.

    I read the other day that “you can’t teach Jonathan Toews’ intangibles”. And that is what is happening with this taupey-grey-navy-tweed combination. Like, it just works. Or TWERKS as it were. On paper PSharp’s All-American-by-way-of-Thunder-Bay look or Stalberg’s Euro Swag (seriously, that suit was tailored by enchanted Swedish angels) are better, but they are just not. Jon is most. Always.

    PS – Patrick Kane, my perfect little cherub, please reconsider this current hair. Unless it is the source of all your badassery on the ice, in which case please skeeze on.

  3. jana Reply

    That back-handed pass last night from PK to Hossa was unbelievable! Hoping to see some of that tomorrow night when I see them play against Columbus!

    Also hoping to get some really great shots of the boys!!

  4. I was at the red carpet event and let me tell you the pictures don’t do it justice because these men are so gorgeous. I kind of wanted to faint when Tazer walked past and I got my high five. And Sharpy my god!

    But my favorite was Bollig and his scarf – damn he made it work.

    (My tumblr has some of my crappy cellphone pics if anyone wants to see – the one of Bollig is probably the only pic that somewhat came out.)

    • Annie, you’re my hero! Were they playing the Ellie Goulding song at the United Center or is that just in my dreams?? Tell me you could smell Toews’ cologne!

      • The song was just played in the video unfortunately.

        I wish I had been that close to Toews. Well, maybe not because I definitely would have said something embarrassing or fainted I’m sure. It was bad enough I got short of breath when he touched my hand.

  5. I have no idea what this post is about. I can’t stop staring at Patrick Sharp…

      • If they could’ve worked a puppy into this, this would be the single cutest video of all time. Who’s kid is that?

    • Seriously, when he came into view and I saw him in person for the first time ever, I gasped. Like… how is he so good looking?!

  6. Gaby Reply

    Seriously, there’s no doubt in my mind that the Blackhawks are the sexiest team in the whole league. Gotta love them!

  7. The Rangers did a blue carpet entrance for their home opener with current and former players (although some players didn’t participate – Henrik’s routine cannot be altered). I tried to take a picture of Brian Boyle, but he was so handsome that I got too flustered. I did get to high-5 Brad Richards. He has very soft hands. He definitely moisturizes.

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