I’m trying to think of an analogy for how I feel.  I knew the lockout would cause the cancellation of some regular season games.  I couldn’t stop it, I could only hope to contain it.

NHL cancels first two weeks of regular season games – USA Today

But now that it’s actually happened I am overwhelmed with the force of my own fury.  I desperately want to:

But let’s be honest. I’m really this guy:

The regular season was supposed to open on my birthday.  What more could a girl ask for, right?  Now I’ll probably have to go to Old Country Buffet or some shit because I’m in my pajamas and can’t stop crying.

I am ditched at the altar, middle of the road, drunk Joan Cusack from In & Out distraught right now.  Just replace the “heterosexual” with “hockey game” and the dress with a jersey.  Everything else in this scene accurately expresses my emotions.  (If you’ve never seen this movie, now you have plenty of time.)

“I’m more miserable than ever and I’m a mess and I’m starving.”

Watch the clip where Howard says he can’t marry her and she loses it.  Also me.