Hey, I’m back!  Intern Jeff Skinner reporting for duty!  No one around here seems to care, since Pants was on vacation and leaves again tomorrow for her honeymoon.  Supposedly she doesn’t know where they’re going.  Pretend to act surprised when it’s Pittsburgh.

Come here often?

At least then she can’t keep telling me I should have closed my mouth in the NHL Tonight commercial where I’m pretending to ride the bike.  (She’s watched that far once, by the way – too busy rewinding Stamkos and his cereal.)

I made my comeback at Washington, but Pants wasn’t there.  Then we played the Penguins, where I took a pretty big hit from Crazy Eyes Orpik and had to go to the quiet room.  She didn’t even call!  I know she was watching!  (Editor’s note: She wasn’t.)

Hmmpphh.  James Neal had the game winning shootout goal and was First Star, I bet she called him.

Really? This guy?

We’re still not winning much and I know Pants finds it hard to watch, because she really does like us.  We beat the Bruins, but I promised Chuck and Cassy I wouldn’t mention it in exchange for extra Mexicolas.  We are also tied with the Lightning at 40 points.  I’m hoping that my return can brighten things up around here and offer some consistency.  When we win, we score a lot (13 goals in last 3 wins.)  It’s not too late to get this season back on track.

Want me to sign your yearbook?