Hooked on a Phil-ing

Every year, a few NHL teams dust off the funny bones and do Valentine’s cards. The Blackhawks are usually tops at this (and most) games, but this year’s are surprisingly mediocre [link]. Still, I was prepared to give them this year’s heart-shaped cake for this gem:


If you want me girl let me know…


Can’t lose with an *N Sync joke, right? That should be a slam dunk.

But no.

phil ings

Got a phil-ing about some nachos in this picture.


Bahahasnortlaughahaha! PHIL-ings! I’ve got Phil-ings about your bowl haircut and what you insist on wearing, Kessel, but nothing this funny. I see him laughing at all the guys traded to/from the Leafs today, while at the same time silently shaking his head, “No, God no!” at Stamkos.

This one also made me snarf. The word “horn” always makes me laugh like a 7th grader in health class-slash-Georgia Nicholson.


Tell me someone’s read Angus, Thongs and Full Frontal Snogging.


The Sid card is cute…


C is for 4 point games and other things that don’t start with C.


But it’s not as good or true as this:


just say yes


Here are all the Penguins Valentine’s. Honorable mention for the adoration derp they caught on Kris Letang’s face:

Me, when I see the sign for In-N-Out Burger.

Me, when I see the sign for In-N-Out Burger.


You know I hate to say it, but some of these Flyers Valentine’s are pretty funny. If you’re into orange and liking things you hate.


Cupid Giroux should have matching wrist casts. If you can play beer pong…


I assume these Bolts cards are from 2016, because if people have been saying “bae” for over a year I’ll feel even more despair about American culture. (Update: These are from last year. I give up on you, American youth.)

tampa bae

When the NHL adopts it, you know a trend is over.


Did I miss any teams that have 2016 cards? The Predators did Valentines last year [link], but I’m not sure how they could top the weird and scared feeling this conveyed:

There are conventions for this kind of mascot stuff.

There are conventions for this kind of mascot stuff.


We’ll be on the lookout for more cards this week, even thought all our PHIL-ings may be committed already.

Tags: , , , , ,

Leave a Reply

  1. Cassy Reply

    Awesome. But I think they stole RunsOnDuncan’s idea lol – remember “I really like you. Seriously” with Captain Derpface himself?

  2. Nope! Bolts ones are from last year. No way Drouin gets a card this year. So yeah, Bae has been around a while, sadly.

  3. “…silently shaking his head, ‘No, God no!” at Stamkos.'”
    Exactly, Phil.

  4. Justine Reply

    The Angus, Thongs and Full Frontal Snogging series is only my FAVORITE!!! Hockey and Georgia Nicholson…this post is my valentine. Thanks ladies!

  5. Fatema Reply

    Really loved the Penguins’ one especially “I’m Cullen you mine” but the Blackhawks were okay. Carolina Hurricanes have some good ones too.