Rock Your Body

As promised, Joffrey Lupul is naked in ESPN Magazine: The Body Issue.

nakedlupul1Saved it from Puck Daddy because they named the file “nakedlupul1.jpg.”

His name is still Joffrey, which is unfortunate.  I bet he gets chills whenever Arya whispers her list.

Here’s a whole gallery of behind the scenes photos from this year’s Body Issue shoots.  Well not BEHIND the scenes, literally – yikes, you need to be careful when talking about this kind of picture.  Anyway, sans lighting and color mapping and well, clothes, Loops looks pretty good.

loops4We see you, dude at the back.  Craning your neck.

The artsy finished product:

loops3Remember that time Cosmo picked Kessel as their hottest Maple Leaf? 

Not to complain about gifts or snacks or naked pictures of hot guys, but I always think the NHL player gets the most boring shot in the every Body Issue.  Other athletes are doing cute things, funny or active things – they’re laying on a pool float or sneaking out a of hotel room with no pants on.  The hockey ones are always so… meh.  Here Ryan Kesler, hold this rock.

This should’ve featured Loops as The David, modestly wearing a Maple Leafs logo.  Obviously.


Against all reasoning, we love this shot (which won’t make print).  Less naked?  More clothing?  That seems cruelly, disappointingly backward but this picture is much sexier.

loops1$20 if you spray Loops with that hose, my friend.

Or this one.  Oh, you’re in a bathrobe, driving an Aston Martin?  Is that Starbucks cup for us?  Because now we’re talking, Joffrey.  Drive on.


Loops had a naked photo internet scandal a while back – Google it if you must, we suggest you don’t.  And don’t read about the Crossing Broad stuff about the girl.  Oh, now you’re going to, aren’t you?  You’ve been warned.  So were they, hopefully by their parents, of being haunted forever by bad, trashy decision.

No one listens.

More on The Body Issue here, including video – but not of Joff.  Remember, ESPN hates hockey.

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Leave a Reply

  1. Could it be better? Maybe. Probably. But I’m not complaining. Not one bit.

    But for the love of god can we get Patrick Sharp next year, ESPN? Please?

    • Patrick Sharp has never even appeared without a shirt, so I don’t think that will happen. Also, the world would cease to exist if that happened because we are not prepared as a people for that kind of beauty.

      • Not true and I will prove it to you on Twitter, Jess.


          • Sorry (not sorry).

        • Marissa Reply

          I’m googling Patrick Sharp now because of this.

  2. They really need to consult the ladies of WUYS when choosing the hockey athlete. We could have a vote. Democracy always wins out in the end!!

    • Marissa Reply

      This is the best idea.