All I Want for Christmas is…


Dear sweet Mother of I Don’t Know What I Did to Deserve This but your girl here was apparently on the REALLY REALLY NICE list this year, and Christmas is a little early.

I screamed when I saw these.  My boss came running and found me face down on my desk pointing at the monitor.  She mumbled something about a “dorky white guy” and left me hyperventilating into a bag of Reese’s Pieces.

“These are a few images from a recent shoot at Longue Vue Country Club of James Neal of the Pittsburgh Penguins for Travis Mathew Apparel.” – Seth L. Williams Photography

Go to the Travis Matthew site now and buy more presents for everyone you know.  Hire Seth L. Williams immediately for all events.  Give these people your money, they have already given us the goods!

Endless, glittery, cupcake-flavored holiday hearts to @svenglass for sending this.  You are my hero.

LOOK AT THAT TATTOO!  Did I just say I don’t like tattoos (re: Mike Green)?  LIES, ALL LIES!

I love it.  I don’t even care what it is.  I will put it on the flag of the country I start when I win the lottery, buy an island and create my own hockey league.

Nealand.  Now accepting applications for citizenship.

James, don’t also start wearing tight pants.  Unless you’re going to call me on that phone right now (202-000-1818), I cannot handle any more physical description or idea of description or basic general approximate estimated information.  Or anything to do with your pants.

Ah, f&%$ it.  More pants!

Sweaters too… don’t leave me any chance of walking away with my wits intact.

This is so autumnal, so back-to-school that I really want to play flag football with accidental, full-body tackling.  Possibly in the mud.  Anyone else get that?

I can’t go on.  I’ve run out of semi-coherent things to say and all I hear is the sound of a cash register ringing in my head.

That’s it.  I’m getting coal and Flyers tickets next Christmas, but it was worth it.

Someone should check on me in an hour, make sure I’m still breathing.

Again, all these photos are from  They deserve a case of wine or a wagonload of gold bars.  Bless them, every one.

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Leave a Reply

  1. Casey Reply

    What a beaut! I keep saying all a girl needs in life are the Bruins, Pats, Sox, a little bit of Kris Letang and James Neal.

    • Pants Reply

      Excellent call. Get yourself a date, Jessica!!

  2. Cassy Reply

    Casey – I feel we must be related…

    Pants – BREATHE WOMAN.

    That is all.

  3. Uh oh.
    Hey James Neal.
    You be mad fione.
    Call me.

    P.S. I like your tioght pants.
    P.P.S. Your tattoo is mysterious and discreet. We like it. Alot.

  4. Kristi Reply

    Flowers. Those are flowers on his arm. I will never again make fun of flower tattoos, I promise.

  5. Misty Reply

    *sigh* I could stare at James Neal

  6. Shayna Reply

    Greatest birthday present ever! Thanks so much for putting these up!

    • Pants Reply

      Happy birthday, Shayna! If I could get him to jump out of a cake for you, I… would keep that for myself, honestly. But I’d invite you to the party!

  7. Ashley Reply

    sweet baby jesus lying in the cradle, merry christmas to us all!

  8. Macy Reply

    Lawwwwd have mercy! This is absolutely wonderful.

  9. Jacki Reply

    Best. Post. Ever. *Thudding sound as I faint*

  10. Marcy Reply

    Flyers tickets aren’t all THAT bad…Briere and Giroux???

  11. The only thing running through my head right now is My So-Called Life when Angela was waxing poetic about how Jordan Catalano leans against things.

    “I just like how he’s always leaning. Against stuff. He leans great.”

  12. MB Reply

    OH MY GOODNESS. I’m speechless. Thanks, Santa. Just…thanks…

    I’m going to go wipe the drool from my chin now, hopefully before my husband sees this… 🙂

  13. Tiana Reply

    Oh, I love this post. Thank you, so much for posting it! 😀 He is so handsome <3