Work. It. Out.

I… I, er…. um…  what?  Oh.  Here at Mike Green World Domination HQ, I had two thoughts immediately upon seeing this.

I even think spelling "defence" with a C is adorable.

1) Sweet baby Jesus in the manger.

2) Should have saved that HP joke, because it’s better here: I just died so hard I turned Mike Green into a horcrux. 

Alas, you know the truth.  There is another dimension where I really do control the universe and this slipped through the cracks: Mike Green Workout Video [link].  He talks about overcoming last season’s injuries and expectations for this year.  There’s no jumping, but we all know Mike has a tendency to fall down a lot.

Intern Jeff Skinner is walking around with earmuffs on because the high-pitched squealing is deadly to boys.  He even gave up on that girl-speak dictionary from last week because it doesn’t have a section for “colorful language.”

Mike also talks about Alex Semin and the comments from Matt Bradley – very diplomatic, Mr. Green (in the library with the candlestick).  He simply says that if you’re not committed, you’re not wanted.  No stubborn defense of Sasha Fierce?  I am impressed.

But really just look at this.  Every single individual strand of his hair is perfect.  His eyebrows make the Korean ladies at my salon weep with joy.  I should worry about a guy who uses this much product at the gym, because you know it wasn’t just for the interview.  But I can’t.

I don’t think my one pull-up workout routine (Intern Jeff Skinner is my trainer) is going to cut it here.  The Eric Staal-lookalike at my gym is not impressed.  Good thing I have all these workout videos for inspiration!  There’s a second interview with Mike [link], quads not included.

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  1. Cassy Reply

    Poor Intern Jeff Skinner! Is it worse than those things in Harry Potter (mandrakes)? That can kill? Could be a useful weapon say, against the Flyers next season 🙂

  2. This is a man for which man-scaping is a way of life.
    You’re right…those eyebrows would make any lady with a pot of hot wax & cotton strips very happy.
    Wonder where he goes to get them done? Mine are in need of a little TLC.

    I miss hockey in the summer…but this plethora of workout videos sort of makes up for it.

  3. raedanda Reply

    This has to be one of the best posts ever.

    And now every time I see Mikey, I will see that hedgehog. For forever.

  4. Do you think I could bring in a picture of MG52 to my eyebrow lady and say “these. I want these, please.”

  5. Thank you…. you made my hump day!!! =)

  6. carter Reply

    If I make it to a Caps game this year, I’m totally making a sign that has a picture of a hedgehog wearing a 52 sweater. The hard part will be holding it up with a straight face.

    • You can come to the game with me and Gator. We never have straight faces.

  7. I’m so happy Mike has gotten his hair issues under control. He’s probably taken styling lessons and practices in front of the mirror. Let’s hope his dry-land training applies to his hair, and that he can keep up his conditioning during the regular season.

  8. I have just made the hedgehog my wallpaper.