Tomas Vokoun – What's Up, Ya Sieve?

10 Days of… oh well.

Pants — Mon, 15 Dec 2014 19:46:31 +0000

I was going to do a “Happy Almost Holidays!” post this morning, but there isn’t really anything good to report. Instead I’ll trye to motivate myself and see if I can do a post a day for 10 days, so we approach 2015 with momentum.

Don’t hold your breath.

Dallas Eakins got fired

Most bosses should be so lucky as to tread water for ages while their ship breaks in half and sinks beneath them like the Titanic. The Oilers are in a special place we refer to as DFL – dead effing last. They have 7 wins in 31 games for a total of 19 points. (Intern Jeff Skinner just threw his juice box at me, because the Canes are in the same boat – literally. At the bottom of the ocean.)

Well, shit.

This would be post-worthy if only for the excuse to search “David Tennant sad” on Google Images.

Kidding. He probably wanted to go.

Who will coach the puppies? Perhaps Craig McTavish for a bit. The man played his entire career with no helmet, so that’s apt. If that doesn’t work, I’m always available. I’ve been training my puppy Blue and am happy to report 12 potty accident-free days! He’s also mastered getting on the couch by himself and eating an entire cardboard box. Free intermission entertainment.

Whaaaaaaaaaa?

Crosby got the mumps

What’s most surprising is not that the mumps still circulate after the vaccine was introduced in 1967. Apparently even with a booster, that vaccine is only 88% effective (not 87%), so this isn’t an old-timey thing or bad karma from anti-vaxxers. It could happen to you. No, the surprising thing is that it happened to Sid. It mostly spreads through saliva, and so I thought, “STOP KISSING COREY PERRY!” (I’m kidding. Shudder.) As someone who got mono in high school from kissing precisely no one, I assure you this isn’t funny.

Really, I’m fine. Giggity.

The Penguins took some serious optimism supplements to let Crosby practice and do interviews looking as he did Friday. He was set to play in the weekend’s back-to-back games for a minute there. He could have scored 10 goals because the other team refused to come near him. They could have played “My Humps” as his goal song. (Sorry, but every time someone says “mumps,” I think it.)

Don’t be creepy.

Then I read this Puck Daddy post on mumps and how gross the on-ice game of hockey is, aside from practices and sharing meals and being locked inside a pressurized petri dish flying from city to city. Now I’m swabbing my entire office with Clorox wipes while wearing a surgical mask leftover from a 28 Days Later promotion.

Beau Bennett has also been tested for mumps. If Sid’ got it and Beau’s got it, you know Borts is either next or immune like Hagrid is to stunning spells because he’s got giant’s blood.

Slava Voynov went to court

The Kings’ Slava Voynov has a very serious domestic violence charge against him, and the details of the alleged attack revealed in today’s preliminary hearing are awful [link]. He has plead not guilty and his wife requested he not be charged [link]. Voynov is on indefinite suspension from the NHL, including team activities – like practices, the violation of which cost the Kings $100k [link].

Tomas Vokoun retired

According the a report cited at NHL.com, Vokoun has decided to retire. He was sidelined two seasons ago as a member of the Penguins with blood clots in his pelvis. He also played for the Habs, Preds, Panthers and Caps, and always kind of reminded me of Jude Law.

Winner of 300 NHL games

EDIT: Just as I thought there was nothing upbeat to post, it’s Tyler Seguin to the rescue. In tights and with mistletoe hanging above his head, of course, so I don’t even need to make a joke about sitting on someone’s lap.

All I Want for Christmas is you, and you. And maybe even that other guy.

Day 10 is a success.

New Season, New Hope!

dawncherrie — Tue, 06 Sep 2011 19:30:21 +0000

I'm sorry ... he's hot. he's perfect. he's a hockey machine. I love him!

This is what I’ve been up to (see below) in hopes of helping the Capitals win the Stanley cup – FINALLY! I was so excited when I read the big fall preview of THN issue that still puts the Capitals as winning the cup in 2012! With all their off-season re-tooling, high praise for GMGM and loyalty to BB for a lack lusture post-season run – AGAIN. Not so rockin’.

I just wanted out of Florida really.

But this year, we got Tomas Vokoun – and yes, SOME ONE frickin’ FINALLY heard me peeps! All that screamin’ in Seattle – and buggin’ my house, the bat phone to DC actually came through and though they protest too much, THEY GOT A GOALIE AND VARLY is gone. Am I dreaming? SRSLY?! I feel like I am swimming in a sea of rainbow skittles and Sasha Fierce has promise to actually play hockey this season – oh please – oh please don’t let me wake up.

they got caught coming out of Ihop ... nicky's mom is really disappointed.

But MG52 better have given Animal his walking papers over the summer. Or Pants is going to give her pouty face again.

Carlson and Alzner went to sleep away camp together for some more bonding time in the off-season even though it looked like one may not make the cap deadline. Luckily McPhee came through with the cash at the expense of another player but you can’t come between the bobbsie twins.

iCarly sneaks a cuddle with Ovi - who WOULDN'T!

And Brooksy looks like he may be a Capital for life which is just fine with him. He may not ‘pump your tires’ but we know he’ll change them if it’s raining after a game even if he’s in his Armani suit – remember that ladies. I foresee many break downs outside Kettler Arena soon!

I may not pump your tires, but I'll change them, ladies!

And we can’t forget the most important pre-season date – 9/17. BEWARE. It’s all I’m sayin. Cause I’ve been saving for it.

I’ll be wearing my highest rated googled sweat pants and this on that day and every game there after … GO CAPITALS!

I needed an accessory to go with my sweat pants did I?

Oh and when the Caps aren’t playing and Mr. Cherrie let’s me watch the Penguin’s : I made this:

And yes, I do wear these.

I'm Holding Out For More Of These Than Any Other LA King!

dawncherrie — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 05:40:41 +0000

Double DTBG wants more of these ...

With the Free Agency thingy all done and gone, DDTBG didn’t quite get what he was hoping for. A restricted free agent, the cone of silence must have been deafening. “Can you hear me now?” is what Dean Lombardi’s morse code tapped out from LA to Canada in frosty covered sparkles.

http://video.thescore.com/embed/the-peoples-reporter-1-on-1-with-drew-doughty

Drew snapped back with “I want to be the highest paid LA King.” Now don’t get me wrong. He already holds the title of the hottest LA King. And don’t go there – with competition like Kopitar, who looks like Jack Nicholson’s The Joker on a good day, and Ryan Smyth who just got traded to Edmonton, it’s not like we’re talking the mad competition of the Washington Capitals where handsome is the new black! I’m talking to you – Tomas Vokoun! Yes, goalie of my life! PWOAR!

God bless whomever got to take this photo ... like really. But Drew - lose the shoes.

But Drew, let have a heart to heart here. You slumped last year. You came to work a little of the hellie the heifer side. You suffered a concussion and then you finally started to come back mid to late season. So to ask to be the highest paid LA King, after all that, really? SRSLY? Did you not see that no one else made any offers? Your dance card is sort of , well, blank.

me and drew making cupcakes in the off-season

So maybe I’ll bring my easy bake oven over and we can make some cupcakes together, you sign that little ol’ contact the Kings want you to sign, it’s called a compromise. I’ll help you out, cause I’m good with that. I’ll make sure there’s plenty of diet coke in there for you and you’ll get some big bucks, too fer sure.