(To those of you lobbying for a Cam Talbot feature, you’ll have to wait until they are playing someone I hate in the post-season. I’m not about to let Foxy Friday accidentally help a Ranger right now.)

Not every team’s fate is sealed, but we’re being reasonable with Wild Card possibilities. This likely means someone will go 9-0 and ruin our lives. Forgoing teams that could still make it (Bruins, FlapAntlers), here’s a last look at the Eastern Conference foxes we’ll miss come April 12. Enjoy them while you can.

Philadelphia Flyers

I WON’T MISS YOU. I don’t care how ginger you are, how curly, how shirtlessly beer pong proficient. Two more games vs Pittsburgh will be plenty, thanks. I don’t think about you when you’re not here.

But if UFA MDZ signs elsewhere, I might be allowed to miss him a little.  We’ll have to see how this skate-gash-to-the-neck (warning: gross photo) heals, because we’re only pretending to believe his “I got bitten by a shark” story for one scar. And we’re still waiting for him to request our help in finding dates.

New Jersey Devils

Adam Henrique’s cheekbones lead the team with 40 points this season, and he’s all smiles in this post-game interview from early March.  Maybe he could play baseball in the off-season, after this play.

Columbus Blue Jackets

Ryan “Shameless Charming Kid Prop” Johansen deserved  his own Foxy Friday after the All-Star Game. I mean, the Flying V? What else does a guy have to do? Blame Ekblad.  But someday, Ry – probably right around when you take this girl to the prom.

If you want to speed up the process, stop wearing hats. Because:

Carolina Hurricanes

After they beat the Pens 257-2 last night (close enough), I am not inclined to include the Hurricanes in this post. But Intern Jeff Skinner already volunteered to work all summer, since… well, you know. And I am weak. Plus someone needs to censor what Jeff does while wearing a white t-shirt.

Don’t just give it away, Jeff! You’re not a Kardashian. (Also, he’s scared of rides at the fair. He just wants to wait in line with you and hold your purse. We are raising this guy right.)

Honorable Mention: Jordan Staal. He reminded us yesterday that he still exists/is handsome. Video @penguins.

Toronto Maple Leafs

I don’t think anyone will miss the Leafs this season, especially because our favorite Leaf is Elisha Cuthbert and she’s back on our TV. (You can watch One Big Happy here.) The Leafs are definitely not one big anything, unless it’s a steaming pile of mess, and there is no happy. Even Joffrey Lupul is posting sad lyrics as status updates, like a maudlin 10th grader. [song]

But at least when the season ends, he still looks like this.

HOLD UP. Did you know you can rate Joffrey’s outfits and raise money for charity?! How have we never known this, we’ve just been doing it for free! Our work, going to waste! Visit lupulstyle.com to vote.

Buffalo Sabres

Poor Zach Bogosian, getting traded to Buffalo. Update NY still loves flannel and fried chicken, though.

At least he’s not alone. Marcus Foligno wants to know if, while you were watching his brother captain a squad of drafting drunks at the All-Star Game, you thought about the cold, windswept blue of his eyes [video]:

No? Well, there’s always next year. And alllllllllll summer. Next week we’ll say goodbye to what’s left of the West, then it’s on to the playoffs we go.

The cold kind of always bothered me anyway.

“I was watching the Sabres game last night….”

But it was on the other day and I was enjoying some Upstate NY (represent!) vs. Toronto rivalry.  Didn’t take me long to tell the otherwise empty room we’d found our next Foxy Friday: Marcus Foligno.

I’d like to officially announce a recount of my vote for Hottest NHL Player: Sabres.  Kaleta’s out, Foligno’s in.

If Cosmo can make so many mistakes, surely I can have one.

Marcus is a 21-year old forward playing in (hopefully) his first full season with the Sabres.  He tallied 14 NHL games last season and spent the rest of his time playing for the AHL’s Rochester Americans.  His dad Mike played for the Sabres and Marcus was even born in Buffalo!  All this Upstate NY love.  His brother Nick currently plays for Columbus.

While the NHL was having a lockout, the Amerks were getting all their players to do the Gangnam Style dance.  Sorry Troy Brouwer, you were game but Foligno’s freestyle wave takes the cake:

What’s that? You want to see it again?

Top quality.

Marcus is also a fighter… at least against Toronto.  Last year in his first NHL fight, he beat up Matt Frattin (97.4% win on HockeyFights.com) and this week he took Mark Fraser for an 80.6% win.

Foligno had 10 goals in the first half of the Americans season, looking to outpace his 16 goal total from last season.  We don’t think he’ll complain about not getting to finish the year in Rochester.

He had 6 goals in 14 games with Buffalo last year.  So far none this season, but his 4 shots in the Sabres loss yesterday to Carolina predict that drought won’t last long.  Chances generated by the Foligno-Ennis-Stafford line have been “encouraging” news for Sabres fans [link], despite a lack of secondary scoring in this young season.

According to Twitter, The Source of All Verifiable News, Marcus liked Silver Linings Playbook and watches USA Network’s Suits.  Am I the only person NOT watching Suits? I see more Tweets about that show than about Manti T’eo.

Follow him at @marcusfoligno.

The Sabres are in DC for a game this Sunday.  I wasn’t going to go – the Caps are too painful – but I might have just changed my own mind.

Note: This post is dedicated to our resident Sabres fan, @Tephywashere.