So you can imagine my utter delight when I saw this while watching the Stars vs. Avalanche game last night.

GREAT ODIN’S RAVEN!

Now that is a beard!

It redefines the term “Fear the Beard”.  With the helmet on, this thing is perfectly symmetrically.  His head becomes this oblong portrait of masculinity, sport, and ridiculousness.

And it’s GINGER!

Now some may say the beard is overcompensation for Zanon’s bald pate.   I like to think that the hairs on his head realized where the real party was at.

I, for one, am glad to know that if his hockey career doesn’t work out, he can find work as any one of the following:

• an extra in a Civil War epic
• an extra in a movie about the impending Zombie Apocalypse
• a home for baby birds and small woodland creatures
• a competitor in the World Beard and Moustache Championships
• a Viking
• a bad guy on the latest season of “Game of Thrones”

Best of all, the Beard’s has its own twitter handle – @ZanonsBeard.  Sadly, it only has 560 followers.

Clearly, this is not nearly enough.

I, along with all of you, our faithful WUYS readers, must take it upon ourselves to spread the word of the Beard. 

Facebook it.

Twitter it.

Hashtag it. (#BeardofZanon)

A wondrous thing such as this needs to be celebrated and heralded by all the hockey world.

All the world must know about the tremendous, awesome, and spectacular fluffiness of the Beard of Zanon.

Thanks to our friends at Puck Daddy, you can learn more about this beauty here.

This week’s honoree –

Ryan Malone

Here are the stats on Mr. Malone –

• Born in Pittsburgh on December 1, 1979.  Not only is he perfectly age-appropriate for Pants and I, we’re also pretty sure he loves maple bacon donuts. (BONUS!)
• a strapping 6’4″ and 219 lbs. This is not a boy. This is a MAN.
• 1st Pittsburgh area native to play for the Pens
• He wears #12 in honor of his dad, Greg, who also played in the NHL
• Career stats: 560 games played. 347 points (168 G, 179 A). A -45 +/- rating (way harsh, man). 600 minutes of shame. 24 game winning goals.

Now onto the real (and way more fun) Foxy Friday stats…

1. Ryan is affectionately know as “Busgy”.  As in Bugsy Malone. You know, that classic gangster movie acted out entirely by children and starring Scott Baio and Jodie Foster.  (Yes, this is a real movie. No, I’m not joking. Watch the entire film here)

2. He’s got this sort of Hey-Dude-Brah-Matthew-McConaughey thing going on and it is pretty damn endearing.  All that missing is a surf board and photos of him shirtless on the beach in Malibu.  Bongo playing optional.

JK Livin’, man.

3. That “Yo-Adrian-Rocky-Balboa  smile.

4. I like a man whose not afraid to show us how much he loves us.

5. He’s got sweet dance moves. Watch out, Justin Timberlake.

I’m bringing sexy back. Yeah!

6. He’s got famous Foxy Friday friends.

Geno: “This is how we say I love you in Russia.”

anything more presh than Stamkos’ face? I think not.

7. The tattoos.  Pants doesn’t like ’em, but I love them.  They’re pretty and colorful and completely distracting.

8. Although he is supporting the Evil Empire, I’m going to cut him some slack.  But ONLY because he has excellent flow and keeps excellent company. #longhairdontcare

9. Watch out, James Neal, Claude Giroux, & Don Cherry. Ryan is giving you a run for your money. #plaidsuit

10. He’s got a GGB – a GLORIOUS  ginger beard. Fingers crossed that the Lightning go far in the playoffs so we can see it in all its wonder.

11. Sometimes, he rocks a mustache.  And I don’t hate it.  Not even one little bit.  He actually sort of works on him.

So there you have it, folks – Ryan Malone, this week’s Foxy Friday. Another worth addition to the Foxy Friday Fraternity.

He’s fuzzy.

He’s tatted up.

He looks like he’d be a whole lot of fun at your pool party.

And he’ll make you fall in love in with him.

Hey Gurl….