It was someone’s job to walk behind John Tavares and hold a sign that said “John Tavares.”

I demand to see your qualifications.

This is so obviously the job for me that I’m just putting it on my resume, because it makes no sense that I wasn’t the one to do it. Here’s the red carpet video.

Gives new meaning to “Climb the ladder at work.”

I could also have held the “PLAID SUIT!” sign, people.

They don’t call him “Stammer” for nothing.

Then, let me just get this out of the way:

Squad goals.

And by “this”, I mean my dead body, fallen to the ground, blocking everyone’s commute into DC. Look at these guys! Look at John’s hair! My enjoyment of this photo is the way a tween feels on the day a new One Direction album drops. I don’t Snapchat, but if I did, I would express this with the “throwing up rainbows” filter.

If this were The Hangover, Tavares would end up with the tattoo on his face. Take care of him!

Hockey clubs can’t even handle me right now.

Obviously the big story of the weekend was John Scott auditioning to play himself in the Disney remake of Goon. He not only went to Nashville, apprently against the NHL’s wishes, he owned the weekend. His kids and goals and his MVP award are all the things we love about sports. Perseverance, faith and, hey, talent (!) delivered with a smile that thanked most people and told some others to kiss his ass.

Proudest fan club.

The support of so many players and teams for Scott’s efforts was also spectacular. Sportsmanship, alive and well! This is what sports should teach kids: not that everybody wins, or gets a trophy for showing up, but that life can be tough – and you can be tougher.  Scott goes, for now, back to the AHL. Fate awaits. But for that moment, when someone said he couldn’t, John Scott did anyway. Bravo, sir.

This is the moment, tonight is the night…

In other highlights, PK Subban topped the moment he wore Intern Jeff Skinner’s jersey with a costume so perfect I can’t believe I’ve never worn it on Halloween. (No wig required.)

And PK looks good with long hair. Is that weird? Nah. These rest of the weekend PK dressed and acted like a million bucks-slash-his regular self. He even does a purple suit and fedora with a minimum of pimp-ness. How?

Most popular man on campus

In the weekend’s other best piece of performance art, Brent Burns appeared as the fictionalized version of himself.

“Where my boyfriend?” – Maz Kanata

Plus he brought a litle Ewok.

Biological clocks ticking so loudly, someone called the Bomb Squad.

Burns’ teammate and Former Foxy Friday Joe Pavelski also brought his son, and Minis Pavelski and Burns scored a goal in the breakaway competition. That drop pass would make any goalie disappear.

Jeez, Pavelski looks good. Sorry Chuck, but I think Joe Thornton turned out to be the Prince William in this family, and all of a sudden Prince  Harry (ginger power! ) is like woah.

Do you know the way to San Jose?

Other important stories:

Claude Giroux is hot.

Yes, you heard me right.

May I be struck down by the Penguins Zamboni for continuing to think this, but….

This must be how Liam feels about Miley and I don’t understand that either.

Probably driving the Penguins Zamboni of Shame would be Malkin, with James Neal uselessly shouting directions in English. Their little reunion this weekend makes me really want a TARDIS. [Video]

Malkin to Neal: “Good luck in the shootout… Look, he’s nervous.”

Take a peek for more from #NHLAllStar weekend.https://t.co/UKzyBz8qR4

— Pittsburgh Penguins (@penguins) January 31, 2016

Geno is also the person on Earth whom I would most like to hug. He feels the way I feel after a long day of doing PR. (Too bad it’s actually my job.)

Bonus Crosby, smizing through his shock that I just said I wanted to hug Geno more.

Meanwhile, Neal (:: sans gingerbeard :: why :: sobs ::) heard what I said Friday about Dierks Bentley and “everyone loves tight jeans”, and he delivered! Video of them skating together in the breakaway challenge here.

I know what I was feeling….

Also, James does not have the best hair on the Preds. There is simply no competing with Roman Josi,

There’s something about Josi.

Matt Duchene made his debut as a second-career country star. I hope this is an available search criteria on DateaCowboy.com (100% real website). Matt also were a cowboy hat and used hashtags #mullett and #yeehaw this weekend, so if music doesn’t work out, he could always blog for us! [Performance Video]

Matt Duchene is an #NHLAllStar in more ways than one… pic.twitter.com/F1RpAyLMfC

— NHL (@NHL) January 30, 2016

Tyler Seguin swore on TV, then apologized to Canada.

Then he made it up to the whole world simply by having been born 24 years ago that same day and thus contributing this to humankind.

Something for everyone.

I was going to say “mankind”, which is casually and confusingly misogynistic. Then I was going to say “womankind”, which is sexist because I have to believe guys appreciate a supernova just as much.

I didn’t hear much about Jamie Benn this weekend. Even if he did nothing but stand around and look like Jamie Benn, it’s more than I do all day.

“What should we do tonight, Tyler?” “Same thing we do every night, Jamie. Try to take over the world.”

(Jamie and Tyler were the only hockey players to make the Forbes list of 30 Under 30: Sports, reminding you they are 1) awesome and 2) practically still jailbait.)

Speaking of jailbait, Aaron Ekblad continues to defy human evolution by appearing to be a good idea. His beard is so Max Talbot, right? Again, right-but-wrong. Should we just call him #rightbutwrong from now on? Done.

What’s wrong with being confident?

Then he posted a photo from his hotel room and (we assume) Nashville sold out of binoculars and protractors as people tried to figure out which window to look in.

Dylan Larkin, who is 9 years old (okay, 19), submitted his application to be our new intern by skating the fastest lap in NHL ASG history. Hey, we were spry at 19 too! (Lies.) But we like this kid, and not just because he can pass notes to Mike Green for us.

Freshman flash

I could go on all day – I nearly have, since it’s noon and all my emails are unread! I hope you enjoyed this and the ASG weekend. Just doing this post has given me all the feelings.

Live shot of my office.

Bring on the second half of the season!  (Now, if something could excite the Penguins, we’d be in business.)

kris letang's slap shot off hiller's mask

So here are my highlights and lowlights of the ASG weekend in no particular order:

1. Only in Canada would they NOT go to the All Star Game because the Grand-Slam of Curling is going into Over Time. Leaving me running around the house in a panic while a large rock slowly drifts down a long runway while a bunch of men rub brushes in front of it.

2. Jonathan Towes is a bit of a gash. Sorry Pants. This weekend only made me dislike him more. He’s a bit a cry-baby. And I think his team mates think so too. Which is why they did what they did.

3. On the other hand, Jeff Skinner made like the Grinch and STOLE THE ASG weekend! At 18 years old he showed poise, sportsmanship and a knock out smile. Watch out for this one!

4. The CBC mic’d up Eric Staal the whole game. All I can say is, next year, please put this game on HBO and mic up Fleury because you know Fleury was talking smack all first period. Micing up E. Staal is like micing up Ned Flanders or a bowl of vanilla ice cream, only vanilla ice cream doesn’t scream like a girl, totes seriously. My cats were really upset during the game.

oh gosh ...golly ... I gotta go get that .. acckk!

please don't insult me with that comparison

6.Danny Briere. Now I don’t like him – AT ALL. And initially I didn’t think he should be there. But after the CBC interviewed him and his three kids, I’ve done a 180. When they asked his son what was the best part of the weekend, his son said, “Spending time with my dad.” Danny seemed to really need to be there more for his kids’ sake then his ego and watching his son give the interview, Danny seemed on the verge of tears. Strange family dynamics going on there but he obviously really cares about his kids and it meant alot to him to have them there. Total Hallmark moment.

7. The CBC interviewing Fleury about his chat with Ovi after Ovi scored on him in the breakaway challenge. One thing you have to love CBC interviews is there are never any warm up questions. They cut to the chase. So when Scott Oakes opens the interview with Fleury saying, “So obviously this isn’t the first time Ovi has scored on you.”  Nice. Way to warm him up. Awkward. Then he continues asking about the intense rivalry between The Caps and The Penguins and what would they have to talk about. So Fleury just replies, ” I try to remain civil, you know, not throw my stick at him.” with a big smile. Way to make Scott Oakes go away.

what is happening to me? two penguins in a post?

9. Mike Green a.k.a. Where’s Waldo? When ever the CBC showed Ovi you got a shot of Kris Letang, which for me, was AWESOME. I already did a post on the best thing that came out of the ASG! I expected to see Mike Green but I got KL. But like, where did Mike Green go? Did he and Ovi have a fight? Was Greenie upset because he got ditched for Kris? Can I blame Ovi?

10. The BEST COMMENT FROM AN ANNOUNCER ON A GOAL EVER: When Briere made his second goal: “BRIERE JUST WENT UPSTAIRS WHERE NORMAN KEEPS HIS MOTHER!”

– Cam Ward was mic’d up and stole the show in the 1st period.

– Lots of guys had a 2-goal game: Danny Briere , Anze Kopitar, Eric Staal, Kris Letang, Loui Eriksson

– Recent Foxy Friday had 4 assists : Shea Weber

– WUYS faves had 2 assists: Corey Perry, Henrik Sedin, Jonathan Toews, Loui Eriksson, Mike Green, Patrick Sharp, Zdeno Chara.

– Jonathan Toews also showed us his spin cycle:

– Jeff Skinner didn’t score, but even Team Lidstrom seemed to be passing him the puck.

– Carey Price was kind of awesome in net.  Barf.

– Ovi threw his stick at Matt Duchene on a breakaway, laughed hysterically, then was charged with the first penalty shot in ASG history.

– Patrick Sharp was named MVP (and Foxy Friday) and won a car.  Just like Phil Kessel.  First or last, Honda is your ride.

Carolina tore it up this weekend – excellent job, everyone.  Good thing it’s another year before it happens again.  Right, Cam?  RIGHT?!

Too busy flirting with the mic to stop all those goals, Cam?!

Cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese.

Yah00! Puck Daddy caption: “Dude, senior prom was weird this year.”

My first thought was: This is how they make their moves on the ladies. Let me dim the lights by throwing my jersey over this IKEA lamp.  Although they both do it numbers-side up.  Show-offs.

In the skills competition, Mike competed in Fastest Skater against Steven Stamkos.  I’m sorry, what?  Ovi couldn’t help but steal Mike’s TV moment.  Here’s how I imagine this going:

You no win. I always win. How feel, Mike?

Ovi: Mike, you not very fast. Stamkos fast.  Also, Stamkos 20 years old.  You not so young.  And Stamkos weigh like 185.  You not so skinny.  He a race car, you a Vespa.  So Mike, how you think you do?

Mike: Stop c***-blocking me, douche.

Mike only lost by half a second, which I think is pretty impressive.

Mike also competed in the Skills Challenge Relay, doing right-handed one-timers from the blue line.  He followed Kris Letang (best defensive pair EVER) and did well.  Tanger had a tough time getting pucks up, Mike did a little better.  I was like a nervous mom.

Apparently, Sports Illustrated’s red carpet interview question was “What should you win an Oscar for?”  Mike answered, “My hairdo.” But should he?  I think he may have been topped this weekend:

Is that guy a Staal? He looks like a Staal. How many are there?

He’s good good angles on the tri-hawk here.  But Ryan Kessler has the thorns out:

Like a cactus.

And the dark horse candidate, no one saw him coming… Rick Nash with the porcupine:

I'm making a point.

What’s the verdict, does Mike’s hair take home the gold? Can any of these guys get a helmet on over these messes?

First, everyone missed their flights to Raleigh.  Patrick Kane was busy packing his “Louis V shades.”  Mike Green and Ovi couldn’t fit two grown men and hockey gear on a Vespa.

When they finally arrived, there was the red carpet.  Roenick asked everyone what they were wearing, and he’s scarier than Joan Rivers.  All you need to know is Fleury danced in his Prada shoes and this happened:

JR FTW.

Then the All-Star Fantasy Draft.  Or it shall henceforth be known: Awkwardfest 2011.  In the best and most uncomfortable 90 minutes in television history, Teams Staal and Lidstrom selected their players.  Highlights:

– Cam Ward goes #1, steals the show.  (This is a recurring theme.)

– Mike Green chews gum, with his mouth open, on stage.  The entire time.  Because he loses the “Best Hairdo” award to Ryan Kessler.

Really? You're picking him? We wouldn't.

– Jonathan  Toews doesn’t get picked at the beginning. Derp face.

– The Sedin twins are split up.  Can aliens live separate from their host?

– Awkward host calls Tim Thomas old for being drafted by a team that no longer exists.

– Jonathan Toews still not picked.  Derrrp face.

– Eric Staal has a mean streak, picks Lundqvist.  Marc Staal says no more Christmas presents.

– Jonathan Toews finally picked. Derrrrrrrrrrp face.

– No one understands the science of microphones.  If you’re back six inches, it can still hear you.

– Kris Letang picked in Round 12?  Idiots.  Swaggers on stage, easily making fools of all.  Trips going up the stairs.  Still wins.

Round 12 is the new black.

– Brent Burns denied our Fear The Beard campaign to show that – surprise! – he looks a lot like sparkly Robert Pattinson.

– Matt Duchene is my new favorite dork.

– Phil Kessel (Cartman) gets picked last.  Thinks Toews had it easy.

– Ovi films, laughs maniacally.

The point of the draft was to liven up the weekend and show the players’ personalities – it certainly did that.  And we just couldn’t Tweet or text fast enough to keep up!  Afterward, everyone congratulated Brendan Shanahan on continuing to be the awesomest of awesometown.

(I didn’t make any of these Macros.  But damn they made me laugh.)

The whole point of this draft was to give me the chance to pick Logan Couture first.  I’ve been to 4 or 5 Sharks games this season, and Couture has a goal in every single one.  He’s really holding up his end of our friendship.

Team Pants, jump for joy!

WUYS All-Star Rookie Teams

The Rookies will compete in the SuperSkills Competition tomorrow, so Chuck and I are just fighting for bragging rights.  I should get bonus points because Fowler lives with the Neidermayers and Chuck should have to forfeit because of Subban.  Right?  Check out Seguin’s sick first goal:

Just to preface, this draft was conducted via Gmail chat and remained mostly civil and professional, with the exception of when Pants drafted Sharp and when Chuck drafted Letang.  Choice , colorful language was used.  There were threats of violence and the removal of earrings and press-on nails before engaging in a girly slap fight.  We learned how from watching Mike Green.

And these guys…

Pants vs. Chuck

We used a very highly scientific method of selecting these teams, which included not only their obvious talent and season performance thus far, but also how awesome their hair/beards are.

So here you go…

Team Pants vs. Team Chuck

So based on this mock draft, who do you think will win this year’s All Star Game? Who will be the MVP?

Chuck suggested that Brent Burns should dye his beard black a la Brian Wilson of the SF Giants.  Thus it only makes sense he would be on Pants’ team.  FEAR THE BEARD.  And we’re not talking about that Amish nonsense the Staal boys grow during playoffs.

Brian Wilson (the baseball player)	Brent Burns (the hockey player)

Red Carpet Arrivals [NHL.com]

Saturday, prior to the Honda NHL SuperSkills, players will arrive at the RBC Center to a red carpet runway. The players will arrive at staggered times from 4:00 p.m. to 5:30 p.m.  All will walk and interact with fans and media.

Hive five, great success.

Schedule of Events (all televised on Versus):

Friday – 8 PM ET (5 PM here, leaving work early!)

NHL All-Star Player Fantasy Draft

Saturday – 7:00 PM ET

NHL Skills Competition

Sunday – 4:00 PM ET

NHL All-Star Game

I got it!

This works out well for me since I’m moving out of my apt and all I have left is a beach chair and my television.  I can tape up boxes while I watch the festivities.  I’m guessing the draft will be my new favorite part of the event, because it’s likely to be more competitive than the actual game.

can't let a day go by without a photo of his hotness

ignore the princess on the left - fleury is adorable!

I think Geno and Crosby should just come clean like Zetterburg and Luongo and say, “I just don’t want to attend. Thanks but no thanks .”  Which leads to a whole other discussion, should there be an All-Star game? Because with the All-Stars dropping like flies – what does that say to us fans? It sorts feels like the ultimate F-You –  D-listed like the entertainment. Dissed and disrepected.

knee looks good to me

Clay Aiken will perform the US National Anthem on Sunday at the All-Star Game.  Stop laughing.

If I was invisible (Wait... I already am).

Clay is a native of Raleigh, a Canes fan and he has performed the National Anthem there before.  I can’t talk smack about Clay because the first thing I did when I heard this was open iTunes, click on “Invisible” (of course I have it) and belt it out.  It’s a great song with creepy lyrics.

But I do have to say something.  We’ve previously addressed the NHL’s tragically D-list celebrity appeal [here].  If only we were famous, we could class this joint up a little bit instead of marveling that the guy who played (Plays? Is it still on?) Lex Luthor on Smallville isn’t really bald after all.

But Clay Aiken?  NHL, WHAT IS YOUR DEMOGRAPHIC? Clay was on American Idol in 2003.  His last Top 40 hit was a Christmas song in ’05.  His current record cracked the charts for a single week in June.  Do you think Willa Ford was busy?

Clay’s new album and tour are called “Tried and True” – featuring all standards.  Admittedly, they sound great.  But Michael Buble is Canadian, couldn’t he sing the anthem?  Even his own? If only Westlife were American, they could have done it.

Aloow us to be Frank.

I’m sure Clay will kill it and hey, it’s only one song.  I just don’t see how this makes any sense for the NHL.  Maybe Aiken’s performance will turn a whole new middle-aged generation of Claymates into avid hockey fans.

My stylist did this.

The real All Star is Mike’s cowlick though – how do you even get a helmet on over this hair? And because you know Ovi hates to be bested at anything, he tried to show Mike up with a ‘do of his own.

Is good, yes?

I’m still Team Green.

Now I'm going to have to buy a jersey!

From the NHL.com article, I just loved this part:

Green has been the NHL’s most dynamic offensive defenseman the previous two seasons, but he has also steadily improved his work at the defensive end. He has eight goals and 21 points this season for the Capitals, and he is fourth in the League in time on ice at 26:02 per contest.

The 25-year-old Green is a two-time finalist for the Norris trophy and a two-time NHL first-team All-star. He’s lead all defensemen in goals and points in each of the past two seasons and in goals for three straight years.

If you don't want attention, don't drive an orange Vespa.

And from the Capitals website:

Green, a two-time member of the NHL’s end-of-season NHL First All-Star Team and a two-time Norris Trophy runner-up, has led NHL defensemen in goals for three years in a row.  He has also been tops among NHL defensemen in points for the past two seasons and is one of only two active defensemen with a 70-point season in his career – the other being Lidstrom, the opposing Captain.  Green this season ranks fourth in ice time per game among NHL defensemen.

To top off today’s lovefest, the chairty organization Sporting Generosity has named Mike their January Player of the Month for doing good things for lots of people. [Link]  No sad puppy face for Greener today!

Our hero.

Lunchtime poll: Will Letang wears a helmet or not? He’d need a headband for sure but it’s a sin to cover up that hair.  Maybe a baseball cap?

Exactly how I sleep on a plane.

The All-Star Skills Competition games are:

Bridgestone NHL Fastest Skater
Is a race! 6 players from each team compete in heats.

BlackBerry NHL Breakaway Challenge™
3 players from each team compete to deliver the most creative shootout attempt.  They get 4 shots a piece and we get to vote via text.

McDonald’s NHL Accuracy Shooting™
Like Crosby’s puck pyramid and Ovi’s weird Russian dressing mess, six players per team will shoot at foam targets in the four corners of the goal.

G Series NHL Skills Challenge Relay™
New event and it’s a big one!  16 players from each team in four relays.  Each skill must be completed before the team can move on to the next.  Two relay groups per team.

• One-timer: shoot over an 8″ obstacle
• Passing: put a pass into each of 6 nets set up around the ice
• Puck control: Slalom cones while keeping the puck on the stick
• Stick handling: Keep the puck on the stick through a series of obstacles
• Accuracy shooting: Knock out four targets.

XM NHL Hardest Shot™
If you can’t figure this out, Chara gets to shoot at you.

Discover NHL Elimination Shootout™
Musical chairs for the shootout, like the Penguins have mastered.  Only they make people grow mustaches and run to the top row of a football stadium.  In this, it’s 1 point per goal and a lot of bragging rights for whoever makes it to the end. [Graphic from NHL.com]

We kinda hope Tanger and Tazer end up on opposite teams so they can showdown in the shootout challenge!

Mine. Mine. Mine.

Team Staal, all the way.

This is the ultimate olive branch because even if you hate the Wings (slowly raises hand), you love Lidstrom. The man is 40, classy as all get out and just about as awesome now as he ever was.   In this video, EStaal jokes about MStaal (boo) and Patrick Sharp (yay) telling him they want to be picked early in the draft.  Because Thunder Bay looks out for Thunder Bay.

“Staal is from my hometown, so he better be drafting me,” Sharp said. “But I have a feeling he’s going to make me wait it out.” [Chicago Tribune]

Sweet Carolina

No surprise in these selections.  Hometown Hero and the Gentleman Jockey.  Could be Lidstrom’s last season and it could be a while before Raleigh gets excited about hockey again.  We love the players for choosing these guys.

I’m all Team Staal, since he’s my fantasy hockey team captain too!  Chuck is Team Lidstrom.  Eric better take my calls on draft day because there is some strategy to be discussed.  And I will even let him pick Ginger Staal so long as he picks Letang or Green first.

11 All Star Games, 4 Stanley Cups... yes captain.

Un. Deux. Trois. (photo by @NHLBruins)

The Garden crowd thought that Bergy got the hat trick at 14:07 of the 2nd and launched their caps on to the ice, only to have the official scorer credit the goal to the Little Motorscooter, Brad Marchand.  Celebration fail, folks and everyone goes to the Pro Shop to buy new hats.

But Bergy would not be DENIED.  He kept grinding and hustling and eventually got his hat trick with 5 min left in the 3rd.  Cue hat toss (for reals this time)

Nouveau Chapeau gone to waste...

After this win and their stunning victory over the Pens on Monday – 4 goals in last 3:30 min (sorry Pants) – here’s to hoping that the Bruins can capitalized on the momentum, which unfortunately they really haven’t been able to do much of this season.  The B’s are a talented team with arguable the best goaltending duo in the league (Thomas and TUUUUUKKA Rask) and four solid lines that can all score goals.

While they only boast two all-stars this year, that doesn’t really reflect how good of a team they are.  Keep an eye on the Bruins as this season goes on.  If they continue to spread the point production and stay consistent, they could just be a team to reckon with.

Watch out Pants.  Be aware Dawn.  The Killer Bs are coming for ya.

Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Ovi, who cuts your hair?! Backstrom?

Mike laughs because he'd kinda scared.

Ovi wants to be on Mike’s team so he doesn’t have to check him.  But you know he kinda hopes to, just to see what everyone else is so excited about.

And I randomly picked the Lightning because Squishy made the ASG team.  Chuck and I think he is the besteset.  And I still think of him reading his NHL Awards speech off his PDA – presh.  Stammer is so blond, that could the power of their NHL Guardian.  Invisible due to lack of pigmentation. [Video]

You can't see me.

And the hometown boys, mostly because Eric Staal has a billion points for me this season.  He doesn’t smile once in this interview, while Cam Ward can’t stop.  How fun to play in front of your home crowd. [Video]

Captain Serious

Cam gets bonus points for starring in one of my fave commercials so far this season.  It’s just so southern!

Tonight on The Bachelorette...

We can’t get 10 extra seconds to let Tanger talk?  Bonus clip of him licking his lips while Sid talks – he could be thinking what I’m thinking. Apparently The Hat has not been retired.  Better than the ‘stache, though.

Please be captain, so I can get a TEAM CROSBY t-shirt.

Geno’s English is getting really good – he doesn’t look pained to speak anymore and he makes himself laugh.  That’s a lot of hard work!  And Flower looks as happy as ever, plus the greatest accent of all time (“I’ll get you, Ricky Bobby!”).

Merci beaucoup!

Can’t wait to see who the ASG players choose as their captains.  That’s the real popularity contest.

3 for 3!

Sorry Mike. ;(

Mikey was not on the list, but I’ll take Duncan Keith FTW! Also, Flower makes me a little, uh… nervous.  But he’s in fine form this season and was selected as the #1 overall goalie vote-getter.  Yay Flower!

In like Flynn.

So the NHL Hockey Operations Dept will choose the rest of the ASG pool, then the players will select their own captains: 2 captains, 4 alt captains.  They’ll take the stage in an ASG Draft on Fri, Jan 28 and the 3 captains for each team will draft their squads.  Each team will have to pick 3 goalies (by the 10th round) and the defensemen must be picked by the 15th round.

Reaction videos already up for Tazer [video] and Keith [video].

Awww shucks.

I am really excited now.  The first batch is just a popularity contest, so there are tons of great players to be added.  Still 4 out of 6 are Pens and they didn’t even win the Cup?  Boo-yah.

Oh Malkin...

Sid looks awfully serious here, almost bird-like, while Toews is just waiting for that stupid popcorn to finish in the microwave.  You can vote as many times as you want, so my interns are spending the day writing in Kris Letang and voting over and over.  Any other requests for my hockey sweatshop?  My defensive pairing looks like it just got paroled and called you for a ride home from the clink.

Your mom warned you about these guys. You didn't listen.

It’s a little early in the season to be deciding who the best players will be 2 months from now.  And what about injuries?  Parise’s on the ballot though he’ll likely be out, and JStaal isn’t though he’ll likely be back.  The fans vote for the starting 5, and the rest of the All-Star rosters will be chosen by NHL Hockey Operations.  I’m all about guys named Tim for big performances this year (I heart Lincecum).  And Thomas looks like that guy from that band.

Timmmaaaaay.

So vote early, vote often and check back next week to see who’s in the lead.  Really, my interns are waiting.  Remember, the ASG team rosters will be selected by playground beat-down this year, so you could get some awesome line mate situations.  Let’s make it count.

I’m willing to bet that most NHL players never experienced this (except Gionta).  Now they’ll have their chance.

The NHL announced the new All-Star Game format, which will debut this year at Carolina.  Here’s how it will work:

A new format for this year’s festivities will see the conference vs. conference approach replaced by a player draft, conducted by the All-Star players themselves, to determine the rosters for each team.

The 2011 NHL All-Star Fantasy Draft will be Friday, Jan. 28, to kick off All-Star Weekend, which will be hosted for the first time by the Carolina Hurricanes.

Captains for each side will select from a pool of players chosen by a combination of fan balloting and the NHL Hockey Operations Department. The change in format is a joint effort by the League and the NHL Players’ Association. [NHL.com]

After the entire All-Star squad has been chosen by fan voting and NHL Hockey Operations, the players will choose 2 captains per team.  So if Crosby & Toews are chosen captains of one team and Ovechkin & Gionta captains of the other, those four will then alternate picks to draft their respective teams from the remaining 38 players.  We know which side would have blue lightsabres in the battle of good vs. evil!

I'd rather kiss a Wookie.

What do you think of this? Shanahan’s all for it, as is Rob Blake: more excitement, mix it up, invest the players in the fun of the event.  And since there was no All-Star game last year due to Olympics, it’ll be nice to have everyone back.  The Skills Competition is still the highlight – should we call it the Showboat Competition?  The Hockey Hair Pageant?  For my vote, I think the fantasy draft is a cute idea and I look forward to seeing how it works.  Players from the same team could face each other – Ovi’s shot blocked by Green, Getzlaf vs. Selanne on a face-off.

Спасибо. (Spasibo.)

There’s one solution the NHL has not considered here:  Team Cherrie/Pants vs Team CI/Chuck.  The epic battle of choosing good vs. good-looking, sexy vs. scoring ability and the inevitable hug between Sid & Ovi when C/P wins… a sports legend in the making.

PS: @DaveLozo is tearing it up on Twitter with random imaginings of how the draft will go down.  Hilarity -“Alex Ovechkin with his hand-written lists on notebook paper saying, ‘I’m pretty sure I can get Semin later. I’ll take Toews.'”