Must’ve Had a Good Time

I am SO late in posting a recap of one of my favorite hockey games ever! Back on Thrusday, 11/17, the Capitals hosted the red hot (all puns intended) Dallas Stars. Meet my friend Jess. Isn’t she pretty? With her red coat and red hair, she could be the Caps mascot… except they already have one […]

Hockey Thanksgiving!

I woke up this morning to the Twitter “moments” collection of Fat Pets. Honestly, if my true calling isn’t assembling brilliant colelctions of internet things, I may never find purpose in life. So, while I wait for my fat pants to finish in the dryer, here is a list of five hockey-related things we are […]

Only Weird if it Doesn’t Work

Today really got away from me – because I spent it recovering from last night, when this happened:   Instant, full-volume inner monologue:   It’s a understatement to say  the Crosbot is off to a slow start this season. With 3 G and 7 A, his 10 points rank him 134th in the League. This from a […]

Stars in 2016

It’s election time in the US – wait, not really. We have another year of this crap! But one hockey squad isn’t missing the chance to fast track their big campaign: The Dallas Stars really want to be your favorite team. Campaign Strategy #1: Jamie Benn and Tyler Seguin have all the points.   Combined, Seguin & Benn have 44 […]

#BeardWatch2016 Begins

In September at our college reunion, I confessed to Chuck that I am secretly so tired of writing about beards. I can’t be funny anymore, I am no longer inspired, I’ve seen everything and…   I LIED. BEARDS ALWAYS. Did anyone know about this? I’m glad you didn’t warn me. #TeamEbs turning up in November looking like […]

Sharp Dressed Men

Forgive me for having been away, as now I am talking about all the old things. I’m like your drunk aunt at Thanksgiving who starts telling a story someone else just finished telling. Trust me, you won’t mind hearing this one twice. Sharp Magazine wants men in Canada to have nice clothes and a classy lifestyle – […]

When in Rome…

How dare this premiere while I was away? Picture me, phone in hand, running toward the beach on some Caribbean island, wondering if I can swim from there to Brooklyn. John Tavares, Prince of Khakis, may be second in perfection only to Cabbie, who seems to have a live feed of my inner monologue running […]

Pens and… that’s a Pig

GAAAHHHH! The start of hockey season is racing past while I am so busy at work. Leave it to this to get me out of the office…   IT’S A PIG! Named Truffles! It is in the Pens & Paws annual animal rescue calendar and isn’t it precious?! You can see the whole video here. […]

Home of Hockey

VIRUS FREE! Opening Day! We are back and all is right with the world. This post is a few days old, but just as full of things I love about hockey starting today. Love, *P When I saw this: My first thought was: Then my interfriends kindly informed me this was from a commercial – […]

Who’s Scruffy Looking?

October, you beauty. We wait all year, and usually you arrive with a terrifying array of fresh mug shots or ransom photos calling themselves roster head shots. But this year, you have arrived in style.   Take this in: Sidney Crosby woke up on roster photo day and did not shave. Good gosh. He probably ironed the […]

Fiddle in the Band

Get it? “If you’re gonna play in Texas, you gotta have a fiddle in the band”? No? Oh well. Country music problems. Today we have another guest training camp report, this time from Texas and courtesy of Brenda (@wishinonehand)! The day before Brenda was heading to Texas on vacation, she got a Facebook message from […]

Back in the Game

Hello internet! Hockey is upon us and I, for one, am not ready. Starbucks can sling all the pumpkin spice mochachocalattas they want, but it just doesn’t feel like fall until I see this: Okay, now it’s fall. Our friend Heather is a spare-time ace photographer, and took these gorgeous shots at Penguins training camp. In […]

Made of Hockey

Hello? Anybody home? It’s been 131 days since we did a blog post and honestly, it’s all that sloth’s fault. Look how cute he is! Big smile, no thumbs – it’s so hard to type when we’re bursting into Kristen Bell-type tears all day long. But hockey season is nearly upon us. Sorry sloth, time […]

Foxy Friday: You Tell Us

Happy National Hairstyle Appreciation Day! Okay, it was yesterday. How this is 1) a holiday or 2) occurs without our say-so is a mystery, but it’s never too late to join in the, er, appreciating. Especially on a Friday. I’ve very scientifically chosen the photos below.  Browse them – and we mean Take. Your. Time. (For example, […]

Love Me Like You Do

There’s been a lot of press the last few days about the terrible experience some Caps fans had at Nassau Coliseum during Game 3 vs. the Islanders on Sunday. You can read the original story here, the Isles’ official team response and about a follow-up investigation into harassment and vandalism by local authorities. Caps owner […]

Foxy Friday: Farewell

There are three Fridays left in the regular season, and with that, it’s time to bite the bullet. We must bid adieu to some of our favorites, sending them off to summer with strict instructions for shirtless boat-selfies, colorful golf pants/plaid shorts and hey, if anyone wants to pour ice water over his head and post […]

Can We Panic Now?

Oh my God, a blog post. I know. We have been everywhere except in front of our computers lately, or honestly in front of TVs watching hockey. Who vacations in the spring? Fools! I looked at my calendar and all of a sudden: It’s almost April. The Penguins have 9 games left. I AM ALARMED. […]

Foxy Friday: Ondrej Pavelec

Who knew Winnipeg was such a helpful city? In addition to being the hometown of Jonathan Toews (and others), they held an actual vote to determine the best looking member of their NHL team. Canada: Using Democracy for Real Things! The result probably surprised no one except Evander Kane, who retaliated with a sweatpants-based protest, […]

Jackpot! (I had to.)

The Penguins traded their annual Skates & Plates waiter gear for other ill-fitting suits this year and hosted Aces & Ice Casino Night last night. It looked like the World’s Most Awkward Wedding Party. But two drinks in, the bridesmaids are yelling, “DIBS!” and making shanks out of bobby pins. The dads, like Alison’s dad there on […]

Two of Hearts

My name is Pants, and I support two hockey teams. A while back, @eyetotelescope suggested we address the idea of liking more than one team. Many of you are in the same boat (er, on the same door) at this treacherous time of year, when four-point games rain down, winning streaks become glorious victory marches and slumps […]