Mustache Monday

We are halfway through November, and that means halfway to getting these mustaches off everyone’s faces!  Just kidding – we love Movember and applaud the many men’s health concerns for which it raises awareness and funds. Just don’t wear a mustache home to meet our parents on Thanksgiving.

grabner

#sorryhesnotsorry

This year I donated on the promise that Mr. Pants would spare us all from his attempt. [Donate here]  Ever the joiners, some of our favorite hockey players could not be persuaded by the same argument.

crosby

Does this mustache make my jersey look 80s?

The Sidstache continues its bi-annual tradition of failing to ruin Crosby’s face.

Tweet

Twitter is our confessional.

For a guy I’m willing to guarantee has never seen an adult film, John Tavares’ mustache is alarmingly licentious.  Give it a week to darken and a glass of scotch, it’ll be straight off Paul Rudd’s face in Anchorman.

tavares

Sex Panther (Yes, I really typed that.)

Like our favorite season – playoff beards – Movember is a time when any hockey player can shine.  The enthusiasm is fueled by charity, rivalry and selfies taken up one’s own nose.

winnik

crashzoom

Winnik’s mustache is pretty spectacular, but Komarov is no slouch.  Did we say get these mustaches off?  Rescind.  Let these babies grow.

komarov

It’s so heavy, he can’t stand up.

Chuck wanted to hire Eddie Lack as our new intern, then Intern Jeff Skinner saw his Movember face and sighed with relief.  This does not work for free.

lack

Time for a trim, Eddie.

She’d have had better luck with Montreal’s Brendan Gallagher, who could get a dollar for every hair in this mustache and still need to borrow five bucks for lunch.

gally

Soul patches may result in disqualification

But it’s not the result that count. It’s the effort and collective knowledge that no one, in any year, can ever really win Movember.  Because let’s face it, not even 2014 Beard of the Year and Stanley Cup winner Jeff Carter can really rock a mustache.  He’s just standing in this hallway, waiting for D’Artagnan to arrive for their duel.

carter

Also resembling this guy from Justified.

Who’s rocking your favorite facial hair this month?  With two weeks to go, who else will finish strong?

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Leave a Reply

  1. Lindsey Reply

    You forgot Luke Glendening, he’s got the 80’s porn stache going on

  2. BKNY1999 Reply

    Kevin Klein of the Rangers is rocking an awesome stache.

  3. Angie Reply

    Looking up the definition of licentious is my vocabulary lesson for the day. Thanks Pants for teaching me something new every time I read your posts!

  4. “Soul patches may result in disqualification.” THIS. Seriously, there needs to be a law against soul patches. They are the El Caminos of facial hair.

  5. Absolutely dying at the “waiting for D’Artagnan” part. Yet another awesome post from you amazing ladies.

  6. My all time favorites are Loui Eriksson and Kris Versteeg. All the 80’s porn star vibe going on.

  7. When Jeff Carter is his clean-shaven, beautiful, dreamy California-self, I’m not attracted to him. When he’s in the midst of an out of control playoff beard and/or sporting a weird Movember moustache, it’s like hubba-hubba. I’ve made peace with this fact.